


together they fight crime.

by Laylah



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Crime Scenes, Detectives, Gen, Homestuck Shipping Olympics
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-08-08
Updated: 2012-08-08
Packaged: 2017-11-11 16:48:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 304
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/480685
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Laylah/pseuds/Laylah
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Karkat wishes they'd be more professional about it, though.</p>
            </blockquote>





	together they fight crime.

**Author's Note:**

> For Bonus Round 5, these three at a crime scene :3

"Oh for—Gamzee, goddamnit, don't touch that!" you bark.

Gamzee looks over his shoulder at you from where he's crouched on the floor, and you'd swear his grin is _smug_. "Sorry, best friend," he says calmly.

You're barely looking at the body, barely registering the splashes of green all over the block. Sometimes you'd swear he fucks up crime scenes just to give you something else to worry about.

When Kanaya brings green-stained fingertips to her lips, you groan. "Not you, too," you say. "It is _not_ snack time right now. It is crime-solving time."

"Agreed," Kanaya says. "However, in the absence of a portable blood-testing laboratory, I am our most reliable option." She licks her lips thoughtfully. "There are traces of some foreign substance in the victim's blood, suggesting he was poisoned as well as bludgeoned."

"Oh, shit yeah," Gamzee says, nodding. "That would motherfucking explain it."

You don't want to ask, but you're in charge of this circus. "Explain what?" you ask.

Gamzee gestures at the blood splatter on the walls. "That ain't how a motherfucking greenblood sprays when it's fresh," he says. "Shit's gotta be wicked kinds of clotting up already to stick like that."

Your thinkpan starts to throb, warming up for the incredible migraine this case is going to become. "So our killer is someone who would poison their target, allow the poison to take hold, and then horribly abuse the corpse to try to disguise the crime."

Kanaya nods. "That rules out perhaps half of all trolls," she says.

You take a deep breath. "Motherfucker," you say.

Gamzee laughs his loud, honking laugh, and Kanaya's lips twitch as she resists a smile.

"This case is going to suck," you tell them both. "Okay. Let's see what else we can find around here before we start rounding up suspects."


End file.
